FSI’s No. 1 volunteer

Since March 2013, Freedom Speakers International (FSI) has welcomed more than 1,200 volunteers who have generously given their time to empower North Korean refugees with English education, public speaking and career development. Along the way, we’ve witnessed countless inspiring stories of mentorship and transformation, with over 600 North Korean refugees joining us in their journeys toward self-expression and empowerment in English.

While many have volunteered with FSI over the years, some were great, some were mediocre and some were terrible. Among the many great ones, the number one volunteer in FSI history is Mark Bendul.

He first joined FSI in 2017 and has remained with us ever since, even becoming a regular financial donor. At his very first orientation and matching session, Mark didn’t stand out. He barely spoke. His responses were curt.

So, what makes him the number one volunteer in our history?

One, although we’ve had many outstanding volunteers, Mark was the first and still only to be recommended by North Korean refugees who began telling one another about this tutor who gave them focused, high-quality mentoring. As a result, other North Korean refugees began requesting him as a tutor or mentor. His reputation grew through word-of-mouth among those he mentored or tutored.

Two, he stayed focused on mentoring, not becoming buddies with North Korean refugees. Mark informed us in his application in June 2017 that he was a retired detective lieutenant looking to volunteer to help others. But he never let his career define his role as a mentor. When North Korean refugee students asked about his past, he would smile, look at them, and steer the conversation back to their studies. His style was centered on boundaries and focus, a sharp contrast to the approach of many volunteers who are eager to open up their personal lives or involve North Korean refugees in their own personal activities outside the scope of our organization.

Some of Mark’s students contacted us to complain about one thing: “Mark won’t tell me about himself!”

Over-sharing can blur the lines. By the time North Korean refugees find us, they are eager to tell their stories in English. In our experience, the most respected and effective mentors have been those who stayed focused on the work, not on becoming buddies.

Three, he always welcomes me into his classes. Some volunteers treat observation by FSI staff as uncomfortable or even suspicious. Not Mark. He never once acted awkward when I dropped by in person or dropped in online. He understood that our goal is to continually learn from one another and improve how we prepare North Korean refugees for public speaking. I am the architect of our academic approach and the senior mentor for all of the North Korean refugees, so it is important for me to observe them.

His openness wasn’t just about transparency — it was about trust. Mark has always understood that feedback and reflection make us better, not weaker.

Four, when I was chosen to be the MC of a TEDx event, Mark was the mentor I called to join me in preparing a North Korean refugee speaker and the other speakers. When another speaker had the opportunity to present at the Oslo Freedom Forum, it was again Mark who helped me prepare him. He lets us know his availability, and when he’s free, he never says no.

Five, although he is bilingual, he never used Korean with North Korean refugees studying with us. He mentioned he was bilingual in his application, but once he learned about our English-immersion approach, he respected our process and only used English.

On Wednesday, Mark visited our office again during his current trip from the USA — as a newly published author. We’ve known for years that he was working on a book. “Got 586?: A Korean Immigrant Tale of Murder & De$eption” is by Mark Bendul and Theresa Fanelli.

We spent part of the afternoon talking about his book. Eun-koo is now studying for a PhD in international relations and has been an assistant to a professor. Part of her role was to help him with soliciting book deals in the Korean market. Eun-koo offered practical advice about navigating the Korean publishing scene. But the day wasn’t just about Mark’s book.

As we wrapped up our chat, Kang Na-ra, one of our newest keynote speakers-in-training, arrived for her mentoring session. Na-ra has been working hard preparing for her first public speech in English, scheduled for next week. I’ve seen her progress firsthand — from struggling to read her script last year to now moving with confidence, making eye contact, and owning her story.

I invited Mark to sit in. Mark, true to form, offered direct, no-nonsense feedback. He didn’t introduce himself, although Eun-koo did explain to Na-ra he is a senior mentor with us and someone we trust. He didn’t focus on her journey as a speaker and he didn’t ask for her back story about why she wants to be a speaker — he judges based on what he sees. For some, that style can be jarring. She pointed out moments when Mark reinforced what I had already taught her.

Mark even introduced a variation on a technique I’d used with her — one I now plan to incorporate into future mentoring sessions.

At FSI, we’ve worked with more than 1,200 volunteers from around the world. But when we think about what it means to mentor with purpose — selflessly, skillfully, and without ego — we think of Mark. Those five reasons above are why I call him the number one volunteer in our history. Now that he has published his book, we can tell students in the future to read that if they want to learn more about him.

Casey Lartigue Jr. (CJL@alumni.harvard.edu) is the co-founder of Freedom Speakers International with Lee Eun-koo, and co-author with Han Song-mi of her memoir "Greenlight to Freedom: A North Korean Daughter’s Search for Her Mother and Herself.”