Falling in love with Kim one last time
By Lee Seong-hyon
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A nuclear love affair is no different from a human love affair. As the initial infatuation fizzles out, so is the psychological “high” that drives the courtship forward to the next level. It seems that's where Donald Trump and Kim Jong-un are stuck now. Doubts about denuclearization have begun to permeate the public sphere.
The current stalemate in the Kim-Trump relationship is not conducive to giving birth to a nuclear-free North Korea. So, this is a time when the couple could use some marriage counseling. And remember, it takes Dr. Love, Jesus and Kierkegaard to solve the problem.
Dr. Love is a welcome voice of wisdom. And according to Dr. Love, a feeling of dissatisfaction arising from a lack of satisfaction and excitement, mind you, is actually quite common for many couples. So, this is not something to be too alarmed about. Actually, this is a time to be cautious with those “alarmists” who sing a chorus that Kim and Trump will break up soon. They even argue that Trump should never have met Kim in the first place. Ouch!
The problem with the alarmists is that they always talk about why the relationship will not work. It's easier to diagnose the problem and difficult to offer a solution.
It's also not helpful to inflate the issue more than what it is. The issue is that Trump and Kim need to sort out “So, what's next?” after their maddening diplomatic intercourse in Singapore. The U.S. demands North Korea submit a list of nuclear facilities and a timetable for denuclearization. North Korea demands that the U.S. formally declare the end of the Korea War first, so as to “prove” Trump won't hurt Kim. Among couples, “who should make concessions first” is quite a common issue.
It's also not helpful to see the marriage as a public display of social status. Unfortunately, some people thought it was beneath the “dignity” of the U.S. superpower to sit down with a pariah leader from a poor country. These people see the Singapore summit as a “reward” to North Korea that the latter doesn't deserve. Ego undermines love.
It's also not helpful to dwell on your partner's past. But to many, North Korea is a hard to love. North Korea is hard to trust. Pyongyang has a track record of zigzagging on its promises, twisting words, and blaming others. In a relationship, it is manipulative, easy to get sulky and resentful, often turning incommunicado. Pompeo also said the U.S. is “clear-eyed” about North Korea's past.
For nearly the past 25 years of nuclear courtship with Washington, the “Kims” have had a history of committing to the holy promise of denuclearization, but indulging in the secret orgy of nuclear reproduction activities.
Now we have Kim III. Is he any different from the previous Kims? Frankly, we don't know. But remarks from those who met him personally, including Pompeo, establish some grounds to the proposition that North Korea under Kim III may be different. At least, we might as well test him.
But pessimism persists. “Being nice to Rocket Man hasn't worked in 25 years, why would it work now?” even Trump himself also twitted in October 2017. This is when we should turn to Jesus, who said, “Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9). Trump read this passage from the Bible and changed his mind. Perhaps.
It takes a tremendous mental leap of faith to have faith in North Korea and its publicly worded intent for denuclearization. And here comes Kierkegaard, the Danish philosopher. Trusting North Korea's Kim may be a challenging human task. It may therefore take Kierkegaard's “leap of faith” to believe him.
The irony of the “leap of faith,” as put forward by the Danish philosopher, is that one should believe first so that one can have faith. This is the most difficult paradox to defend. Trump happens to be the first ever U.S. president who has decided to test this paradox.
Failed love hurts. It wounds people. Sometimes we hold onto grudges, refuse to forgive. But if Washington decides to test Kim III, it should love him like you've never been hurt. This is something absent.
Lee Seong-hyon (sunnybbsfs@gmail.com), Ph.D., is director, Center for Chinese Studies; and director, Department of Unification Strategy at Sejong Institute.