Letter From Volunteer Buffer
By Kim Heung-sook
Dear mom, as I heard the 10 a.m. Memorial Day siren calling for a moment of remembrance yesterday, memories of my 24 months of military service came rushing back to me. At the time, going into the army was the last thing I wanted to do, but I survived. Not only that, but I have to admit that the compulsory experience taught me many different things.
I am far from being a patriot, but the two years of conscripted life offered me an opportunity to ponder on some topics I had never paid any attention to ― the nation I was born into and the duties and rights of a citizen. In the course of such thoughts, I acquired a vague sense of social responsibility, first the realization that somebody had sacrificed their time and energy so that I could live freely without minding national issues, and then the conclusion that it was only fair that I do my own share.
Then, I decided to make the best out of my life in barracks, though it was like torture in the beginning when I was at the lowest rung of the hierarchical ladder. Owing to your spiritual support, I was resolved to learn as much as possible from the new assignments and environment. Now, I can proudly say that my time served was not a waste.
Dear mother, I'm trying to explain why I had to join the crowd at the City Hall plaza the other day for all your dissuasion. The moment I saw on television men, women and children standing against the riot police, I wanted to do what I needed to - serve the nation. I put on my Homeland Reserve Force fatigues and went out to them. For the first time in my life, I wanted to be a buffer.
I wanted to talk the citizens and police out of violence. I wanted to remind both sides that we were one family struggling to solve problems together. Though I have yet to mature, I am old enough to understand that all families are not like mine. I have seen more than a few families in crisis caused by a grandparent, father, or brother who signed a contract or an agreement without comprehending the gravity of its terms, out of sheer ignorance, infantile pride, fervor or frivolity.
When the damage is done, the entire family works to correct the situation or minimize the impact. While struggling, family members often lose their dignity, but the worst happens when the person who made the mistake fails to recognize his or her error. In some cases, the troublemaker resists efforts to solve the problem, egging others on to sympathize with him or her. The family unity is harmed and solution is delayed.
Dear mom, as you pointed out, the incumbent government has committed a blunder by hastily agreeing on the nearly unconditional access of U.S. beef to the Korean market in the absence of proper negotiations, but I doubt it was purposeful. President Lee Myung-bak probably wanted to celebrate the time-honored friendship between the two allies through the comprehensive opening, while reciprocating President George W. Bush's warm welcome at Camp David in April. A former successful CEO, he may have been too self-confident about diplomacy, which he knew theoretically but not in practice. He may now be realizing that a war without weapons is much harsher and complicated than he thought.
It would be annoying for him to see the onslaught of critical comments on the Internet and the waves of candlelights glowing on the downtown streets of major cities across Korea. Also perplexing should be the lack of etiquette, let alone empathy, on the part of Washington: the top U.S. envoy in Seoul has added fuel to the public protest by saying ``Koreans need to learn more about the science of US beef" while denying ``any need for renegotiation of the agreement."
Dear mom, I truly hope the President has learned his lesson and will never fumble again. As you said before, time is kind to people only when they are ready to learn from their failures. I hope he will survive his current hardship with modesty and will be able to look back on it with a smile as I do my early military days. Otherwise, we may have to see more seas of candlelight in the coming days and I will have to serve again as a buffer. If you don't want to see me go out in my fatigues after work, mother, pray for him, not me!