Kaleidoscope of Korean Life — Marriage, Children ...
Koreans’ lifestyles are changing. Layoffs triggered by the financial crisis are bringing about new challenges to marriage. Families with school-aged children are pondering whether they should move for better school systems. Although it is common to get married after turning 30, those who married beforehand say its the best time in their marriage is transient. Suicides among senior citizens, a phenomenon prevalent in this aging society, are left unchecked with few providing a helping hand. These trends were disclosed and confirmed through about 30 studies and surveys during an annual seminar by the Population Association of Korea on Saturday. The Korea Times staff reporters Oh Young-jin and Jane Han compiled these new and existing phenomena. ― ED.
By Jane Han
Staff Reporter
Marriage Sweet Only at Start
Twenty-something women, who are happily married to their dream men and living picture perfect lives: Enjoy it while it lasts, because a recent report shows that the joy will slowly start draining out once you hit 30.
The depressing result is based on a study of 7,882 married women aged from 20 to 65, according to the Population Association of Korea, which studies the life patterns of Koreans.
The institute said that women in their 20s showed the highest degree of gratification and contentment in a marriage.
And the reason is simple: The romantic tingle and excitement keeps women pumped with passion and charged with all sorts of positive emotions.
``The intimacy between husband and wife is strongest among newly weds, so it's natural that marital satisfaction is highest for women during this period,'' said Lee Yeo-bong, a professor at Kangnam University, who wrote a thesis on women's perception of marriage.
He explained that women's marital satisfaction is directly linked to the emotional and physical closeness they have with their husbands.
Passion starts to wither away after a few years of marriage, but the report says women in their 30s manage to retain their sense of happiness through the fulfillment of bearing children.
The stage of bearing and raising kids is what keeps 30- and 40-something women more satisfied than those beyond their 50s, it said.
Lee explained that older women become more disgruntled, even though they have less work to do around the house, because free time opens up more chances to rediscover problems in their marriage.
``Many couples sort of put away their problems for years and years so they don't have to deal with them,'' he said, ``but those issues come back to shadow over people's marriages later on.''
To wisely deal with a marital crisis, Lee advises that husbands and wives share a hobby and spend more time together doing an activity that both enjoy.
Clueless on Spare Time Use
Five-day workweeks and extra family days have been introduced in recent years to help working people enjoy life, but it turns out that a majority of free time is used to do quite a lot of nothing.
The amount of downtime given to the average Korean increased 7 percent from 288 minutes per day in 1999 to 308 minutes in 2004, but the biggest chunk of this time was used to watch TV, smoke or sit around, according to Yoon In-jin, a professor at Korea University, who wrote a thesis on Koreans' use of free time.
The result of the study, which was based on a survey of a total of 74,607 men and women aged above 10, was presented at a conference hosted by the Population Association of Korea Saturday.
It said that people ``killed'' 77 and 69 percent of their spare time in 1999 and 2004, respectively. They spent the most time watching television.
Those taking a more productive path invested most of their leisure hours in entertainment, including going to concerts and theaters, playing games and enjoying night life.
Koreans spent 24 minutes on average taking part in such activities in 1999, and then 38 minutes in 2004, according to the report, which showed that people invested the least amount of time on personal development ― encompassing anything from learning a new language to exercising.
Nineteen minutes were dedicated to these activities in 1999, while the time increased to 25 minutes in 2004, Yoon said.
She explained Koreans' use of spare time still lags in terms of quality and maturity, stressing that much-needed freedom should be directed toward a more meaningful purpose.
Her analysis points to a polarization in free time use, as individuals with a higher level of education and income were more productive compared to those with less education and earnings.
It’s Time to Fight Elderly Suicide
The rising life expectancy means a growing population of the elderly. This demographic phenomenon also brings about a lot of problems that society has to solve.
One is suicide. Those among senior citizens often receive less attention than those of young people.
According to a recent survey by Sangji University, the elderly take their lives for a complicated set of reasons. Among them are an inability to support themselves, a sense of guilt for relying on children and children's indifference, among other things.
One interesting finding by professor Park Ji-yong is that some seniors kill themselves even though they are well off, being supported by children. Park interviewed 27 senior citizens who were 65 years old and above in Seoul and its neighboring areas for the past three years until August last year. All 27 who were interviewed were ``survivors of suicide.'' Out of the 27, eight tried to kill themselves within eight months of their previous suicide attempt.
Park claimed that the repeated attempts showed there is a lack of a systemic approach to deal with those ``at risk.'' The professors said that only six of the sample received counseling of any sort ― talking with family members and friends or taking sessions with experts.
``Those seniors who attempted to take their own lives or their families tend to keep it a secret, feeling ashamed,'' Park said, adding that the seniors citizens in question feel guilty that they brought an extra metal burden to the family members, while the latter feel likewise for their failure to attend to their aging parents and grandparents.
The professor called for outside help ― from the government and community ― to provide management to senior citizens included in the group of those at risk, creating a close-knit network for the vulnerable and their families.
Education Holds Up Family Moves
Families with children aged between five and 19 tend to move less frequently as their offspring grow older.
According to the National Statistical Office (NSO), families with children aged between five and nine or composed of preschoolers and low graders in elementary schools are the most frequent movers at one out of five. The ratio for families with children between 10 and 14 was estimated at 16 percent and those for 15 to 19 at 15 percent.
NSO researcher Kim In-sik said that families tend to move less when their children are in junior and high school in order to provide them stable surroundings to study. In Korea, junior high seniors compete hard to enter special purpose schools specializing in foreign languages or science. For high school seniors, entering prestigious universities is a priority that often determines their career path.
Meanwhile, the inflow of those of school age is high in the Gangnam and Seocho districts in southern Seoul, places where the best schooling is said to be provided. Also receiving a strong inflow of families with students is Yongin, the bed town community in the vicinity of Seoul where new apartment complexes are being built.
Kim said that, in some areas, the education environment influences a net inflow and outflow of students, but overall it inhibits movements. In other words, those who stay in their communities for schooling outnumber those who are moving out for a better education environment.
One-Child Moms Key to Low Birth Problem
Korea's birthrate is the lowest in the world, meaning that its population would reduce significantly, unless the current rate is kept from falling. The central government, together with local entities, is trying to find ways to encourage women of childbearing age to have children.
A researcher at the state-run Korea Labor Institute argues that a shift in focus is needed to target one-child mothers.
``Currently, the government's birth promotion is focused on the families with two or more babies,'' Shin In-chol of the institute said. ``But a realignment is necessary with the keener attention given to mothers who have only one baby.'' Currently, education expenses and other state child support increase in proportion to the number of babies.
Shin said that his survey confirmed that mothers with one baby are less inclined to have another than those with no child.
The researcher said that mothers who have two or three babies are not reluctant to have more because of a bigger package of incentives and their previous experience of childbirth. Those with four or more show reluctance to have more.
More importantly, Shin pointed out the large portion of mothers with one child. The 2008 statistics show that first babies accounted for 52 percent of childbirths, while seconds and thirds occupied 38 percent and 9.6 percent respectively.
``Encouraging four births is not statistically strong enough,'' Shin said, explaining that it would be limited in its effectiveness in bringing up the birthrate.
In addition, the researcher said that the birth promotion policies are uniform across the country without regard to special circumstances in specific areas.
``Local governments just follow the directives handed down from the central government,'' he noted. ``This will not help so it is important to encourage local entities to come up with policies that are tailor-made for their unique situation. The policy change can start by providing them with more discretion.''