Internet addiction
Dear Dr. P,
Hello I am a newly married career woman in early 30s.
My worry is that I am addicted to the Internet, entertainment news and smart phones. Even if I have things to do, I just spend too much time on surfing the Internet and reading ‘needless’ entertainment news.
The worst part is that I feel ashamed and guilty after having spent so much time on doing this stuff. I always tell myself that I should discipline myself and limit my time for doing wasteful things but I always fail to keep the promises I make to myself.
I think it has a lot to do with my growing complaints with my work life during the day time. While surfing through Internet or reading the entertainment news, I like the fact that I don’t have to think nor do anything. It is actually very convenient for killing time as well.
How can I fix this problem? I would greatly appreciate your advice on this.
Dear Sender,
These days, it is no exaggeration that we are living in a flood of information. In that sense, it is true that the information gathered through the Internet or a smartphone is very helpful and useful. But there are not only positive aspects but also negative aspects. So I would like to recommend you to cultivate the positive aspects of Internet surfing and decrease the negative aspects of it as possible as you can.
First off, you are saying that it may be related with your growing frustration at work in day time. You should try to find the true reason behind the frustration. As it is, doesn’t the dissatisfaction or frustration make you escape into Internet addiction? The dissatisfaction with the work will be a bigger problem than Internet addiction in this case. You should put your finger on the reason for your complaints with your work life and try to solve them.
When you are full of hope and have a more positive attitude to your work, it will be easier to control your behavior. For example, I heard the story of a young man who had the dream of becoming a CEO. He thus used to work with an ownership in mind and he eventually became the CEO of that company.
If there is no hope for your work life, it could be another chance for you to seek the things that you really want to do in your future life.
I wish you the best of luck.
I have a 21 month old daughter - we have been in Seoul for seven months now and a three-year-stay is anticipated. My daughter is not speaking yet and although my gut feeling is she is just on her own developmental schedule and she has been exposed to about four languages since her birth in the house (including nannies), I think it would be wise to seek an evaluation and possible therapy (I would have done this easily in my home country).
Could you possibly assist me in getting into contact with an English speaking professional in Seoul who can assist me? In the small chance that something is amiss, early intervention is always best. I would appreciate any thoughts, ideas and guidance very much. Many thanks and kind regards.
Mrs. V
Dear Mrs. V,
I know you must be really worried about your daughter because she is showing developmental problems in a far away foreign country. The first possibility for your daughter is a developmental language disorder, which shows delay in language acquisition, but the prognosis is relatively good. It might be more of a hindrance than a help for her language development if she was exposed to four languages since birth.
It is desirable for you to seek an evaluation and therapy as soon as possible. Fortunately, I have two major certificates, one is as a general psychiatrist and another is as a child and adolescent psychiatrist. So I can really understand why you are worrying about your daughter and I think I would be able to help you and your daughter with her problem.
If your daughter needs a more advanced test or special treatment including language therapy, I will arrange it. But, I would like to extend an invitation to my clinic first, because there is the possibility that your daughter is within the normal range of development.
Thank you,
Dr. Park Jin-seng is a psychiatrist who runs a clinic for foreigners in Seoul and operates personal therapist forums on www.lifeinkorea.com. Please submit questions for him to mdoctor@korea.com or call the hotline at 02-563-0678. Those who have their questions selected will be presented with a copy of “Finding Yourself within Love” (Korean e-Book) that he wrote.