Solitary living

By Park Moo-jong

Loneliness is a complex and usually unpleasant emotional response to isolation and also the unhappiness that is felt by someone because they do not have any friends or do not have anyone to talk to.

Whereas, solitude is the state of being alone, especially when this is peaceful and pleasant, often valued as a time when one may work, think or rest without being disturbed, according to dictionaries.

Paul Johannes Tillich (1886-1965), a German-American Christian existentialist philosopher, widely regarded as one of the most influential theologians of the 20th Century, said, “Loneliness expressed the pain of being alone and solitude expresses the glory of being alone.”

Justin Timberlake, an American singer-songwriter who is one of the world's best-selling musicians, cited as a pop icon, also likes to be a solitary man, saying, “The best part about being alone is that you really don't have to answer to anybody. You do what you want.”

Solitary living is in vogue among young people with a sharp rise in the number of one-person households, which is expected to account for nearly 70 percent of the total in 2035. Furthermore, the number of people living alone is to steadily increase due to a worsening job market amid the prolonged economic slump, the low birthrate and an aging population.

This new trend of our society is contributing to the creation of newly coined buzz phrases. The signature term “FOR ME” for the solitary persons now stands for For health, One, Recreation, More convenience, Expensive.

The new current features “honbap,” “honnol,” “honhaeng,” “honsul” and “honyeong.” Literally translated, “hon” is alone and “bap” is meal, “nol” playing, “haeng” travel, “sul” liquor and “yeong” movie.

Eating alone, playing alone, traveling alone, watching a movie alone and drinking alone have been taking root as a new way of life in our society. Unfortunately, however, the trend also illuminates the ongoing economic slowdown and hardscrabble living of ordinary people.

Noteworthy is the fact that the one-person household is not a mere demographic change but it has an influence strong enough to change the economic, social, cultural and political structures.

The sharp increase in the number of people living alone changes existing consumption patterns, forcing related industries to introduce diverse services for solitary persons for a remarkable growth of a “solo economic market.”

Up until several years ago, dining out alone or drinking alone in a restaurant or a bar used to be an unfamiliar scene in our society where a family is dubbed “sikku” meaning persons or members of an organization who eat together. “Sik” means eating and “ku” mouth.

Enjoying dinner by oneself in public might have other diners in groups feel as if he or she is basically announcing to others around him or her that “no one wants to eat with me.”

It used to be difficult for solo diners to find an eatery, particularly, during the busy lunchtime and at a gorgeous restaurant for dinner because the owners did not want to give a table-for-four to one person.

But there are “real” solo diners who are very welcome by restaurant owners any time: taxi drivers. “Gisa sikdang is a restaurant for cabbies. If you are not a cabbie, don't worry, you are welcome to share a table with other drivers very naturally.

Of the things one does alone besides eating or drinking, watching movies or going to concerts by oneself is gaining literally explosive popularity, with the “one-person audience” surging to be a top hot issue in the cultural industry.

The CGV (CJ Golden Village, multiple cinema chain of CJ Group) Research Center found that the number of persons who visited the CGV alone in 2012 accounted for only 7.7 percent of the total audience. But it rose to 9.2 percent in 2014, 13.3 percent in 2016 and skyrocketed to 17.1 percent last year.

Until a few years ago, a movie house was one of the most favored locations for dating couples, families or friends. To cope with the rapidly changing trend, a multiple film chain in Seoul reorganized the seats for solo viewers. All the seats were separated one by one by partitions, so that the single person audience cannot be disturbed by others next to him or her.

The solo viewers can laugh or cry upon seeing the movie in their separated seats without minding others in the audience. They say, “What a great advantage!”

Yet, the world is still not a place where one can live by oneself. The latest trend is threatening to weaken our growing generation's sociality, while boosting their individualism only, when state-of-art digital devices such as smartphones enable them to play alone with the machines any time and any place.

Young people may become lonely, not solitary in the long run. It is a personal tragedy that one doesn't have to answer to anybody as an ordinary person, not like the American star Timberlake. How lonely is he or she?

I am concerned about whether I should comply with the trend. But I prefer eating “together” with my friends and family members.

I'd like to be a solitary man, not a lonely man. How about you?

Park Moo-jong (emjei29@gmail.com) is a standing adviser of The Korea Times. He served as the president-publisher of the nation's first English daily newspaper from 2004 to 2014 after working as a reporter since 1974.