Foreign residents reflect on Halloween tragedy's impact on their lives

A foreign woman takes a photo of a memorial wall in Itaewon, Oct. 27. Korea Times photo by Jon Dunbar

Oct. 29 marks the first anniversary of the Halloween crowd disaster in central Seoul's Itaewon, which took the lives of 159 people. For many, there are conflicting feelings on how best to acknowledge the day. For some of them, it is a period of painful nostalgia and reflection.

"I’m still dealing with it, but in a different way compared to the immediate months after. I think that’ll be the case with most people," said an American expat who wished to be identified by their initials N.S., who spoke to The Korea Times last November about the lack of mental health support for foreign residents in Korea. They added that they had "paid for online therapy to help cope."

The lack of readily accessible health care services and open discussions about mental health was felt strongly by many in the foreign community in the months following the tragedy.

Another American expat, surnamed Kittrell, told The Korea Times about experiencing troubles with anxiety and depression prior to Itaewon, which only became worse after the disaster. They ended up seeking therapy online. "It’s a taboo here. I didn’t see what other option I had."

Insufficient mental health support has been a hindrance to many this past year. A Canadian eyewitness to the disaster, who spoke to The Korea Times on condition of anonymity, said how they also turned to paid online platforms, such as BetterHelp.

"I got professional help online. If you don’t live in Seoul or Busan then you’re already at a disadvantage. I went to support groups which helped ― but at the end of the day, you need a qualified professional for this type of trauma."

Irish national Dean Grantish spoke about how the tragedy has impacted him. "I used to be quick to complain, but I started mentally calling myself out whenever I did it. I started appreciating the little things ― I still do." Grantish added that he has since left Korea. "The cutthroat hagwon work life isn’t for me," he said. "If Itaewon taught me anything, it’s that nobody is guaranteed a long life. So I left."

This type of reaction was shared by others. Once her struggles with confined spaces eased, Eleanor Baumber noticed a change in her perspective. "I’m more spontaneous than I used to be," the British national said. "The things I would put off doing because I thought I wasn’t good enough or not capable, I don’t put them off anymore."

Baumber spoke at length about her fortune in having a supportive workplace and colleagues surrounding her, which was "an immense help."

This appreciation was shared by Jake Hillmons, an ESL teacher presently based in Daejeon, who was an eyewitness to the disaster.

"I was lucky and got help from work. I know that some people didn’t ― I don’t know how I would’ve managed without it," he said.

The sad truth that having a supportive workplace is described by so many as a fortunate perk rather than integral to a business model, is a discussion that needs to be had, alongside the reevaluation of business ethics in Korea.

Grantish, who is now teaching in Vietnam, struggled to dissect and articulate his feelings about the approaching anniversary. "I can’t get into the whole celebration ― not this year," he said. "I honestly don’t know how I’m feeling about it all ― the initial trauma has gone but I can feel myself being tentative about the whole thing."

A disorienting array of emotions is coupled with the sensitive question of how best to acknowledge the day. At the center of discussions is whether or not the day should become one of remembrance rather than festivity.

"My school is still going ahead with the usual celebrations," an American English teacher said. "I think it's a difficult one for management. Lots of hagwons are all about English immersion and that includes the culture too, not just the language."

People pass by a signboard recently installed at the newly named October 29 Memorial Alley in central Seoul's Itaewon, Friday. Korea Times photo by Jon Dunbar

The cultural meaning of Halloween has been widely contested among the foreign community. Unsurprisingly, the consequence of this particular debate is the numerous stances on how this day should be treated in years to come.

Canadian expat and ESL teacher Renata Barrett holds an opposing view. "It’s not as if Halloween has been around for hundreds of years in Korea, so there’s nothing to miss," she said. Rather, it has grown in popularity within the last few decades, evidence of exposure to Western culture.

Barrett added that she gave her full support to her school’s decision to treat Halloween as a day of remembrance. "I think it’s for the best," she said. "The kids understand too."

‘The school where I teach is having a dress-up day, but not Halloween-themed ― we haven’t got any decorations up either,’ said a U.K. national teaching English here, who asked to be identified only by the initials M.D. He went on to say that this was a change from previous years which included Halloween-related games and lessons, involving both parents and students.

"It definitely feels more dulled down this year," added Katie Woollard, an EPIK teacher from the U.K.

Ellie Goodwin, who has taught in schools in Korea and China, lived in Korea at the time of Itaewon tragedy. She currently lives in the U.K. and contributes to European-based news outlets.