Feeding, sleeping biggest trouble for parents

The Korea Times

The Korea Times

Lifestyle

Mon, December 4, 2023 | 08:58

Healthcare

Feeding, sleeping biggest trouble for parents

Posted : 2015-05-03 19:01

Updated : 2015-05-03 19:01

By Jane Han

I get a surprising number of e-mails from mom and dad readers every week. And it's amazing how quickly we bond over discussions about baby gear and feeding schedules.

A few e-mails back and forth, and I already feel like we go way back.

Going through the most recent e-mail threads in my inbox, I thought it may be helpful to share the top three most asked questions.

Before we go on, keep in mind that I'm by no means a parenting expert ― just an ordinary mom with three kids all under two years of age.

OK, so let's start.

Food is definitely a big thing for parents.

Whether your child is two-months-old or two-years-old, stressing over feeding is nothing unusual.

Luckily, none of my three girls give me persistent trouble over eating.

My four-month-old easily chugs down 5 ounces of formula once every three to four hours.

Doctors recommend infants at this age take in anywhere between 24 to 32 ounces of breast milk or formula per day.

There was a period of two weeks when Baby C only took in about half of the recommended amount.

Concerned, I kept trying to forcefully feed her only to have her spitting up in the end. I stressed for about three days and decided to let go and follow her schedule.

She continued to eat less than normal, but played and slept just fine. After about 10 days, Baby C made a comeback, nearly maxing out on the required amount per day.

I realized, yet again, that babies will tell you what they want.

We, as parents, try to fit them into our schedule and expectations, but babies have their own needs.

If they want and need to eat, they'll do so. If not, let them go light for a few days ― or weeks.

It's not the end of the world. Yes, this is something I have to remind myself again and again, too, as I'm guilty of being obsessive about feeding.

But we have to remember that kids, unless they begin talking, can't express that they don't want to eat.

How torturous it must be to have someone shove food down your throat when you just can't take it in.

So as far as eating and feeding goes, we really need to try to read our child's message.

The next or I should say equally big issue for parents is, of course, sleeping.

This is something that's directly linked to the well-being and sanity of mom and dad, so I completely understand why parents are always asking each other, ''How much does your little one sleep?''

Parents often wonder how in the world I put all three down for naptime and bedtime.

I tell them, timing and consistency is key. It's really all about these two. I can't stress enough.

For the first month after bringing home Baby C, I was pretty much a walking zombie.

I had an established routine with Baby A and B, but having a newborn totally threw everything off.

But after going into the second and third month, I began seeing a pattern and started to have the girls follow a new routine.

Yes, I mentioned above that parents need to stop forcing their schedule and expectations.

Well, not in the sleeping department. From my experience, this is one area where children really need discipline.

Kids, the older they get, aren't going to want to sleep when we want them to sleep. But once they get a complete understanding that, no matter what, they're going down at, say, 8 p.m., they're going down.

End of discussion.

I strongly believe that good, quality sleep leads to fun and energetic playtime, which leads to healthy eating habits.

One activity is connected to the next and, to me, sleep is where it all begins.

So to moms and dads stressing over sleeping schedules, I say, despite how difficult it may be, establish that routine and parenting is going to be so much easier. I promise.

Last, but not least ― in fact, perhaps one of the most stressful things for parents ― is discipline.

This doesn't pertain to infants, but once toddlerhood begins, yes it does. Oh yes.

I get a lot of e-mails asking where I draw the line. This is something that differs for each parent and family.

To me, if I have to repeat something more than three times, that's when Scary Mom makes her appearance.

My toddler girls don't like Scary Mom, but after seeing her about a dozen times, the twins now know what triggers her to come out.

It hasn't been long since I began practicing strict discipline on my girls, but I'm realizing the importance of it every day.

It seems like age two is an important turning point since that's when children typically begin showing strong signs of ego.

I don't want to suppress them too much, but I also do not want them to go out of control and do harm to others.

This is another area where consistency is again key and it's also an area where I need more practice.

Looking at the conversations I've had so far with parent readers, I'm thankful that we can share our experience and give help to each other, no matter how little it may be.

Please continue to take part in the conversation as we move ahead in our parenthood.

jhan@koreatimes.co.kr