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Ann, left, and Ellen begin exploring English as they face the difficulties of the language barrier in their school life. / Courtesy of Jane Han |
By Jane Han
First of all, I'd like to thank all my readers who wrote in to share their own first day of school stories and cheered on my girls who've now entered their third week of school.
Saying third week of school may be a little misleading because, although it is the third week, Ellen and Ann have only been to school four times.
They only attend Mondays and Wednesdays, and they missed one day because of a stomach bug. Hence, they're still very much terrified of the idea of being left in a room full of strangers speaking an unknown language.
Up until the second and third day, there were a handful of other kids crying. Now, it's literally just my daughters.
Ouch.
The girls have become so upset that their teachers and I have agreed to cut the day short for the time being with an early pick-up just before nap time.
It's distressing to see my little ones so sad and tearful each and every time they are at school for the entire three hours that they're there.
To help ease their anxiety, I tried talking to them about their fear and frustration. We tried to get down to what is bothering them the most.
It turns out, it's the language barrier.
I've heard a countless number of times that "for kids this age, language isn't a problem."
Well, clearly, that's not the case for all kids this age.
Ellen is super talkative when she speaks Korean at home. Note: Not just talkative _ super talkative.
You will rarely catch this girl not speaking anything. Even when she plays alone, she is saying something. She is just an individual who loves to verbally express herself.
So imagine this child at school, where no one other than her twin sister _ out of a couple dozen people _ is able to effectively communicate with her. That alone seems to be enough to frustrate her no end.
For Ann, we have a different story.
She is usually quiet and reserved. She comes off as less outgoing and confident compared to her twin, but Ann is typically the one who takes in and adjusts to new surroundings almost immediately.
So why does she cry?
Because she sees Ellen crying, according to the teacher's observation.
It goes like this.
Ellen starts crying. Ann goes over and tries to console her sister. They hug and do their sweet little sisterly thing. But Ellen still cries. Ann gets a little frustrated and then a little more. She starts sniffling, and next thing you know, they're both crying.
So basically, once we get Ellen calm, we are in good shape.
The teachers are so eager to get our little Korean girl adjusted that they even voluntarily began learning Korean via the Internet.
Ellen and Ann are so blessed to have met such patient, loving teachers. It's only been three weeks and I can tell how devoted these teachers are.
Not only their homeroom teachers, but even the school director has asked me to write down some phrases and sentences in Korean to help soothe Ellen and Ann in their mother language.
The teachers said they realized how helpful this may be after they tried copying what the girls were saying in Korean while crying.
Ellen wouldn't settle down no matter what they did, but once they tried following the words Ellen was saying, she stopped and began listening.
Of course they had no idea what they were saying and if they were even saying it right, but who cares?
So now we have an interesting situation where a bunch of American teachers are trying to learn Korean in the hopes of getting these girls to feel more at home.
And at home, I'm trying hard to get my daughters acquainted with the English language as much as I can.
Instead of Korean TV and books, I offer them more in English. Of course they aren't as amused, but they're slowly showing some interest.
At least when they meet random people who don't look Asian, they know they should say "Hello! How are you?" with their awful but awfully cute Korean accent.
I speak English and my husband speaks English, but we are firm about keeping the speak-only-Korean-at-home rule because we know that the girls will pick up English sooner or later and that they'll then be struggling with Korean in no time.
We believe helping them keep their Korean skills as they grow older would be an invaluable gift.
Now that's for later down the road.
Maybe I should be more worried about now? Maybe not?
It's a moment this mom is feeling a little wishy washy.
Let's just give it a few more weeks.