Trapped in limbo: American father's 6-year struggle to find son in Korea

Jay Sung and his son Bryan are seen in this photo taken in April 2018 / Courtesy of Jay Sung

U.S. national Jay Sung hasn’t seen or heard from his son Bryan in the nearly six years since his ex-wife, a Korean national, disappeared with the child in 2019.

Sung, an orthodontist based in Washington, was born in Korea and raised in Ohio. Both he and his son are American citizens.

He and his former spouse, surnamed Cho, divorced in 2019 after nine years of marriage. In June that year, when Bryan was just 3 years old, she took him to Korea for a three-week vacation during the divorce proceedings.

Two weeks later, Cho informed Sung of her intention to stay in Korea with Bryan and cut off contact. A U.S. court subsequently ordered the child's immediate return and granted full temporary custody to Sung.

Since then, Sung, now 44, has been entangled in a protracted legal battle under the Hague Abduction Convention, an international treaty to prevent the wrongful removal or retention of children across borders by one parent. Korea ratified the treaty in 2012.

"There is no word that can describe the pain of losing your child. Neither Bryan or I can get his lost childhood back," Sung said. "When I signed an agreement to let Bryan visit Korea (during the divorce proceedings), I trusted that Korea would uphold the values that they promised that they would stand for. However, almost every government party failed me."

Despite multiple rulings in Sung's favor from courts in both the U.S. and Korea — including a return order issued under the Hague Convention — attempts by Korean court officials to enforce the order have repeatedly failed, Sung said.

The Ministry of Justice, which serves as Korea’s central authority for implementing the Hague Convention, sent multiple letters to Cho requesting the child’s return. In November 2022, the Seoul Family Court fined her 5 million won ($3,600) for noncompliance and issued a 30-day detention order, both of which she ignored.

Between May 2021 and November 2024, six attempts to bring Bryan back were made at his home and school in Daegu. None were successful.

According to Sung, U.S. government officials, including staff from the American Citizen Services unit at the U.S. Embassy in Seoul, met with Korean enforcement officers and urged them to fulfill the international treaty obligations.

“However, the enforcement officers took no action even when the mother picked up Bryan and hid him from the enforcement team, or when she tried to run away with him,” Sung said.

Jay Sung holds up a placard during a one-man protest near Korea's consulate in Seattle demanding the return of his son in December 2023. Courtesy of Jay Sung

There was a brief period of optimism in January 2024 after Korea’s Supreme Court implemented new enforcement rules for Hague Convention cases. The reforms eliminated the requirement for a child’s consent in return order executions, which had been cited as a major hurdle in enforcing the order. This new framework helped resolve another American father’s case in April that year.

However, even under the revised rules, additional enforcement attempts in Sung’s case were unsuccessful.

"My only hope is that now the U.S. government will try to enforce it themselves by extradition request, and I am hoping that Korea would at least not interfere with a competent government doing its job," he said.

Kim Seung-yu, Sung’s attorney at HYW law firm, said the authorities' reluctance to enforce the court's decision has left the case in limbo. Kim accompanied two failed enforcement attempts in April and November last year.

"When the child becomes upset and cries, or when the mother threatens to sue them, the officers quickly back off," Kim said. "If bringing the child back could have been resolved peacefully through conversation, this case wouldn’t have ended up in court in the first place. Court orders are meant to be enforced, even if it requires the use of force to some extent."

However, Cho said that she and her son Bryan were victims of loopholes in the Hague Convention.

According her, Sung has not contacted or supported their son for over five years, failing to provide financial assistance or acknowledge the medical needs of the child, who suffers from a rare disease.

"The Hague Convention was established to protect children and prevent wrongful abductions. But in Korea, it is often applied too rigidly with a primary focus on just returning the child, disregarding exceptions such as domestic violence, medical conditions or the child’s consent," Cho said.

The Ministry of Justice headquarters in Gwacheon, Gyeonggi Province / Korea Times file

US ups pressure on Korea

Yet Sung's case appears to be turning into a source of diplomatic strain between Seoul and Washington, as the U.S. Department of State closely monitors Korea's failure to comply with the Hague Convention.

In its 2025 Action Report on International Child Abduction, released on May 2, the State Department designated Korea as a country demonstrating a "pattern of noncompliance" with the Hague Convention for the fourth consecutive year.

Korea was one of 15 countries listed, alongside Argentina, Brazil and India, among others.

In addition to the U.S. government, the U.S. Congress also seems to be paying closer attention to the issue.

Documents submitted by the State Department to U.S. Congressman Dan Newhouse, viewed by The Korea Times, show that American officials raised concerns about Korea's enforcement failures during meetings with the Ministry of Justice on Feb. 6 and the Korean Embassy in Washington on March 14.

Sung also said that at least one U.S. senator is now showing interest in his case.

The U.S. Embassy in Seoul urged Korean authorities to address barriers delaying the resolution of Sung's case.

“As a key ally, the United States partners with the Republic of Korea (ROK) and other like-minded democracies around the world to promote human rights," the embassy said in an email to The Korea Times, referring to Korea by its official name.

"We have confidence that our ROK counterparts also want to do what is in the best interest of these children and is coordinating with us to resolve this issue. We urge the ROK to continue to review and address impediments that result in enforcement failures of Convention return orders and lengthy judicial proceedings.”

Korea’s justice ministry, for its part, said it is communicating with U.S. authorities.

“We are working to ensure the child’s prompt return by cooperating with relevant institutions and encouraging amicable resolutions between the parties," the ministry said.

“We are in regular contact with the U.S. State Department through in-person or virtual meetings and when necessary, also communicate via the Ministry of Foreign Affairs and Korean diplomatic missions abroad.”