Student Corner Flower Ways
By Park Hwan-hee
Personal, precious memories still linger in my heart of my grandmother, who passed away a couple of years ago. I am willing to share them with you for the sake of her anniversary.
I know many girls are indifferent to how their grandmothers are faring. However, I was quite attached to my grandmother because I had been raised by her since my daddy was in a car accident.
It occurred when I was very young and forced my mother to commute to the hospital every day on a regular basis to take care of him.
Luckily, my mother wasn't injured at all in the accident, except for only a few scratches on her arms. More luckily, I wasn't there at all. I hated going to family get-togethers on days when I could be hanging out with my friends without getting anxious about presentations in English class.
It was Sunday. The luckiest thing of all was that my daddy, even though he had to be hospitalized for a few months, was saved from death and recovered quite rapidly showing profound physical improvements.
But I was sent to my grandmother's and this drove me crazy at first. After all, I did not like my grandmother so much at the time. I often complained and behaved bluntly to her, but every day she would go out to town to get food and items that I liked. I still remember grandmother soothing her swollen feet in warm water after a long trip to the fish market downtown. Cutlass was my favorite then. My grandmother was gradually becoming more and more like my mom. Sometimes we enjoyed talking about my dreams and she usually encouraged me, mentioning several examples of her acquaintances who had done their best at my age.
One day, I just happened to ask her if she had had a dream, too, which I still regret on account of the way I asked her. It would have better to ask what her dream had been like. That was the first time I realized that my grandmother had wanted to be back in her twenties permanently. Needless to say, it was the Korean War that occupied her memories and my grandfather, who went missing during the period. I smiled, and she smiled, too. Her dream was fulfilled though, to get married to my grandfather when she was young.
Afterwards, her dream was to live without any worries or burden.
At first, I thought her dream was too simple but when I looked her in the eyes, I could feel she wanted it earnestly. It was raining outside and the picture of my grandfather seemed to take her back to their home on the green hill with many trees. That night she was strolling about in the grass field with my grandfather. The rain never ceased, and it was my last day with her on my mind. A few days later, I went to the United States.
When I came back to Korea, I found that she was acting strangely. She continuously drooled and forgot things easily. I knew my grandmother needed a medical examination but I didn't expect she had Alzheimer's disease. I never thought that this would happen to my family. Despite her good physical condition, the disease continued to unravel her mind over the years. She broke into tears at the slightest things and wielded a hammer even at the slightest provocation. She often walked in circles around my chair, muttering under her breath.
Because of the disease she did get her wish. She had no more worries and was carefree but in return, the disease took its toll. It was painful for all of my family watching her suffer. Although my grandmother couldn't identify all her family members, I managed to stay connected to her because my knowledge of her is in my soul, as was her knowledge of me.
Because we had shared our souls, she was able to remember me from time to time and at the moment of her last breath, she whispered my name. She smiled again as if she was walking along the flower path at the end of which my grandfather was waiting for her. That night, I was walking with my grandparents hand in hand and decided not to let those gentle hands go. It was gently raining outside.
Park Hwan-hee attends Cheong Shim International Academy in Gyeonggi Province.