Reflections on sexual harassment in our culture

By Cho Kyung-jin

There is an elephant in the room. No matter how much we try to avoid it, avert our eyes away from it, it imposes its full weight upon us. There is a high profile sexual harassment case facing the nation, and we are split over the legacy of a much beloved politician, the late Seoul Mayor Park Won-soon.

After the initial shock, disbelief, disappointment and frustration, I've spent the past few weeks going over the information laid before us, trying to make sense of what happened, and what was happening at the time of Park's death.

I should confess upfront that I was a supporter and admirer of Mayor Park. I, too, used to think that “he was meant for greater things.” If he had run as a presidential candidate, he would have had my vote.

Park was one of the first politicians to pay attention to the plight of community care workers, most of whom are women, underpaid, underappreciated, and often exposed to sexual harassment and assault, while caring for the elderly. This is a cause I have been involved with for the past decade and it is close to my heart. For long, I have considered him an important ally and a visionary.

So the allegations stung, and there was a part of me that wished the suspension of disbelief could last longer. But by vocation, I am a social scientist, and what we try to do, though not always successfully, is to get our emotions and judgment out of the way. We try to look beyond the individual, at the patterns of everyday life and the mundane, and the persistent relapse back into established norms and values that shamelessly accommodate the disparity of power.

And it is all there. A statement read by the victim's lawyer (yes, the “victim,” and not “alleged victim”) says our former Mayor had engaged in inappropriate touching, including light kissing on the knee, sent photos of himself in undergarments after work, and asked her to hold him while he was in bed, ensconced in a private space within his office at City Hall.

He also sent her inappropriate text messages through Telegram, the app of choice for those who want to keep their communications secret from prying eyes. When the victim sought help within the office, she was told that her job as secretary included “attending to the Mayor's emotional state.” She asked for a transfer, and was denied, seven times.

I think a lot of people confuse the Me Too (or #MeToo) movement with the wholesale demonization of the entire male sex. They claim that not all men are predators, and that the movement stigmatizes otherwise innocent and well-meaning men.

But this is not about individual men, good or bad. Rather, the Me Too movement is, and always has been, about the disparity and systemic abuse of power of a higher ranking male senior to a lower ranking female junior within an organization's hierarchy. We forget how persistent the hold of hierarchy is on our culture.

Add patriarchy to the mix, as attested to by the high posts dominated by men, and this hold becomes even stronger. If you are a female subordinate, to resist, or to dare deny a superior's demands, can get you fired.

When the rest of the team ignore and deny the victim's claims, the misdemeanors of the men at the top of the hierarchy, become “benign,” “quotidian” incidents, which are, at best, interpreted as “misunderstandings.” They become accepted as “the order of things.”

Such silencing and acquiescence embolden and enable the men at the top, and further consolidate the hold they have over their domain.

This microcosm with its own perverse cultural rules easily reinforces itself, as women will retreat or conform to this culture, whereas men will learn on the job that positions of power come with many privileges. It takes a lot of courage to break this semblance of “normalcy.” It should not fall upon one individual, the victim, to expose and dismantle this monstrous “system.”

The prevalence of such deeply flawed cultural norms within our society is cause for concern. This regime came to power by claiming the higher moral ground, upholding a more liberal vision of equality for the whole nation. This is why I think that the present regime should be held accountable for this incident. It has an obligation to listen to the victim's story. Her human rights demand it. The younger generation will prove to be not so forgiving for this lack of integrity on the part of the Moon administration.

This is not about labeling Mayor Park as a pervert, nor is it about denying his legacy. It is about recognizing a system that enables powerful men to take advantage of their position to do what they please with female staff in the lower echelons of the rank-and-file.

It is about middle-managers and co-workers who prefer “not to rock the boat” for fear of reprisals, or simply because of fears that they will be powerless to do anything about what the powerful may decide to unleash upon them. It is about pulling down a culture that takes for granted that some female employees are “collateral damage” for “great men” to do “great things.”

I mourn the man and his legacy. He did do great things for this city and admittedly for gender equality in our nation. In this sense, his work is far from over.

Let his death lead to a deeper reflection and frank discussion on the toxic grips of sexual harassment in the workplace, and in our culture at large. I like to think he would have wanted it so. Yes, the man was deeply flawed and what he did was wrong. He was also part of a system that was equally flawed and equally wrong.

The government has the responsibility to unmask and identify this system of enabling men in power and silencing its weaker victims. I deeply sympathize with the courageous victim who came forward with her story. My hope is that all this pain, hers, ours, and even mine, will not be in vain.

And while we're at it, let us use this occasion to get rid of all beds and large sofas in the offices of chief executives. If we truly are to embrace and promote work-life balance, shouldn't our politicians and leaders at least pretend to abide and live by it?

Let these men go home, where hopefully they no longer reign supreme, and give them a chance to find peace and serenity. Our society and culture as a whole could benefit from it.

Cho Kyung-jin (azinku@cuk.edu) is professor of the Division of Human Services at the Cyber University of Korea and concurrently dean of the Graduate School of Interdisciplinary Studies.