Dads and daughters

By Choi Tae-hwan

On the train home, a dad, in his 50s, and his daughter, in her 20s, talked about the past, especially his relationship with his grandfather. It was something they had never done before as a dad and a daughter.

The daughter was surprised to hear that her dad had never been familiar with his grandfather. When her dad was a college student, his grandfather had been sick for a long time. The daughter asked her dad a lot of questions about his school and campus life. His answers were enough to bring dad and daughter closer and more familiar than before as she got to know and understand him.

Another dad took his daughter to Jeju to retrace his steps on his honeymoon many years ago. The daughter was pleased and amazed.

Another dad and his daughter visited the places where the daughter and her boyfriend went on dates, such as a restaurant, the theater, a bar and so on. The dad was very curious about his daughter’s dates ― what kind of food they enjoyed, what they drank, so they could become closer.

Another dad was eager to teach his daughter how to drive and how to park in a parking lot. He was really worried about his daughter beginning to drive. They tended to quarrel because the dad wanted to teach his daughter how to drive as well as possible while his daughter tried to avoid her dad’s lecturing.

I have a habit of watching a TV program, “Take Care of Dad,” on Sunday evening because it seems that I am in the same situation as the four dads on the program and their relationship with their daughters. One of the dads and I are the same age and my daughter is in the same age as a daughter in the program.

I think I was closer and more familiar with my daughter before she became a middle school student. I tried to spend time with my son and daughter as much as possible. I gave my daughter a lot of chances to enjoy many kinds of plays and musicals, and we have a good chemistry. In her elementary school days, I gave her a birthday present, a rabbit, even though her mother was strongly opposed because it had a terrible smell when we kept it on a veranda for a year. Some years ago, my daughter wrote an essay for entering a university including the words, “It was dad that had a great influence on my life.”

As a dad with a daughter, I am so happy with “Take Care of Dad,” which makes me reflect on how to have a good relationship with my daughter in her twenties. I am trying my best to be closer as a father, keeping in mind the words, “Like father, like daughter.”

The writer is an English teacher at Jeonnam Middle School in Gwangju. His email address is cth0707@daum.net.