Put new wine into new bottles

By Lee Eung-tae

The new year has brought new expectations for all. While watching the address of our female president earlier this month, I felt a glow of pride in our country at the thought of recent improvements in the status of women in our society.

Our president and many other competent women are now demonstrating their abilities in top-ranking positions. Thanks to strenuous efforts and the national consensus, it’s harder than ever before to find gender discrimination in most business sectors.

The idea of the natural predominance of men over women, once ubiquitous in our society, seems to be a ghost. Unfortunately, some legacies remain to belittle, harass, insult and discourage women.

One striking example is found in the names of women who were born 40 years ago or before. Compared with today, the status of women in those days was utterly terrible.

As boys were more cherished by family members, and girls tended to be ignored from birth. Mothers also had to live in shame for giving birth to daughters. Girls’ names reflected this dire situation.

Our name is always with us, just like clothing. In those days, women’s names, their most important indicator of identity, were given without careful consideration, which has led many women to live in disgrace all their lives.

There are myriad examples of such degrading names. A baby girl was born on the road while her mother was on the way to the hospital to deliver, so her parents named her “Gil-yeo,” which means “a girl born on the road.” A girl happened to be born near the bathroom, so she was named “Hon-ran,” which means "a girl born in the bathroom.”

Looking around, there are many old women whose names include “Mal” such as Mal-suk, Mal-ja, Mal-lim or Mal-sun. Actually, “Mal” means “the last” in Chinese characters. These names underlie the family hope that this person would be the last girl born to them.

Thinking of how disgraced they felt when they were at an emotionally sensitive age, I felt sorry for these women. Even though I am not at all superstitious, I think names are to the mental self-concept what garments are to our physical self.

Just like neat clothing, nice-sounding names may well give pleasure to both callers and hearers, while vulgar names may well affect those addressed just like dirty clothes.

Last night, I happened to learn about the origin of my 80-plus-year-old aunt’s name. And I felt sorry for her for having to live her entire life with such a disgraceful name.

She was born after two elder sisters. Her family had eagerly expected to have a boy, but against their wishes, she was born. So she may well have been neglected, starved of family attention.

Contrary to expectations however, she was found to be a very calm, pacific child, rarely crying from birth. So her parents named her “Soon-dal,” which means “a calm daughter.”

Looking around, we can see an array of old women whose names were given carelessly and without consideration. Without choice they have lived tagged with such belittling identities.

Nowadays, thanks to the advancement of medicine, our life expectancy is supposed to extend to nearly 100 years. In this long life in a good welfare state, I think we should not be gripped in the shackles of shame due to belittling names. We all have the inalienable right to live in dignity free from shame and prejudiced treatment.

Just like shedding old shabby clothes and donning beautiful new ones, why not change your name and make a fresh start in the new year?

The writer is an English teacher in Gimhae Girls' High School in South Gyeongsang Province. His email address is eungtae@gmail.com.