'Raising children is both parents' job'

By Kim Bo-eun

Lee Won-kyu, 36, recalls the response of his co-workers when he said he would take paternity leave.

“Their first response was, ‘Are you out of your mind?’”

While the percentage of men taking paternity leave is up ― reaching 5.6 percent of parents taking childcare leave last year ― it is still uncommon to the extent that it is considered newsworthy.

Lee, who is four months into his six months’ leave, made the decision to help his wife and also spend more time with his children ― a five-year-old son and three-year-old daughter ― in Nonsan, South Chungcheong Province.

Lee’s wife had worked before she gave birth to their first child, but stayed at home for years until after the couple had their second child.

“She was having a difficult time,” Lee said. So the couple made the decision for Lee’s wife to return to work. But being a working mom was even more demanding. They finally decided to put Lee in charge of the children.

The couple sends their children to a daycare center, but Lee is fully involved in all the chores of raising them, from making their meals and bathing them to packing their bags for the center.

While the children are at the daycare center, he catches up on household chores such as cleaning and doing the laundry.

After dinner, Lee takes the time to read to his children or draw pictures with them.

This is demanding for Lee, but he is sure more than ever that it is the right move.

“Before I took paternity leave, my daughter was always attached to my wife,” Lee recalls.

“After spending more time with her, she and I have become much closer.”

Lee also says he now understands more what his wife was going through.

“You cannot really know what it is like until you change your child’s diapers,” he said, laughing.

Lee also naturally developed an interest in government policies on raising children.

“Before I took the leave, I never knew or even thought about policies on daycare centers, which have become an issue lately, but now I find myself thinking about them.”

He recommends other dads follow suit and take paternity leave.

Lee acknowledges that companies do not welcome this, but that “making memories with your children is not easy if you don’t make time for it.”

“Giving birth is something only women can do, but raising the children is something both parents are able to do,” Lee said.