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Fri, June 9, 2023 | 21:05
Old bachelors, bachelorettes seen as 'flawed, incomplete'
'노처녀 보면 뭘 느끼나' 물었더니…
Posted : 2012-05-22 19:11
Updated : 2012-05-22 19:11
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By Kim Susan Se-jeong

Aging bachelors and bachelorettes seem flawed and incomplete to Korean singles, according to a survey by two matchmaking agencies.

A total of 528 men and women were surveyed online about how they perceive single people of their own gender by Biennale and Feeling You.

The results, gathered from May 14 to 19, showed that 43.2 percent of men thought that an aging bachelor “must be flawed in some way,” while 31.8 percent of surveyed ladies thought an older bachelorette “looks incomplete.”

For men, the top answer was followed by the comments, “He looks pitiful” at 19.7 percent and, “I envy his freedom” at 15.9 percent. The question “What does he do for sex?” stood at 11.7 percent.

For women, the second most prevalent answer was “She must be flawed in some way” at 28 percent, followed by “She must not have that much to worry about” at 15.9 percent, and “She looks pitiful” at 12.1 percent.

“Men are generally more open to marriage, so when they delay wedlock without apparent reason, people start to wonder why,” said Son Dong-gyu, head of Biennale. “On the other hand, if women, who generally seek physical, financial and psychological stability through marriage, stay single to an old age, it feels like they’re lacking something.”

On another note, in a survey asking for reasons “why old bachelors/bachelorettes don’t make suitable spouses,” 46.2 percent of men answered it is because an old, unmarried woman “seems fussy (about her partner)” and 33.3 percent of women said it is because old, unmarried men “seem disagreeable.”

“Both men and women have various reasons for putting off marriage,” said Jo Eun-yeong from Feeling You. “But people that are matched up with old bachelors or bachelorettes often suspect there are character flaws or other problems.”



'노처녀 보면 뭘 느끼나' 물었더니…
32% "불완전해 보여"… 미혼남 43.2% "노총각, 뭔가 모를 문제 있나 의심" 결혼이 늦은 골드미스(노처녀)와 골드미스터(노총각)가 급증하고 있는 상황에서 동성의 미혼들 눈에는 이들이 어떻게 보일까? 골드미스터는 미혼남성들 눈에 뭔가 모를 문제가 있을 것 같이 느껴지고 골드미스는 미혼여성들이 볼 때 왠지 불완전하게 비춰지는 것으로 드러났다. 결혼정보회사 비에나래(대표 손동규)가 연애결혼 정보업체 커플예감 필링유와 공동으로 14∼19일 전국의 결혼 희망 미혼남녀 528명(남녀 각 264명)을 대상으로 전자메일과 인터넷을 통해 ‘주변에 결혼이 늦은 동성(노총각 혹은 노처녀)을 보며 느끼는 점’에 대해 설문조사를 실시한 결과이다. 이 질문에 대해 남성은 응답자의 43.2%가 ‘뭔가 모를 문제가 있나’라는 의문이 든다고 답했다. 여성은 31.8%가 ‘불완전해 보인다’고 답해 각각 가장 높은 비중을 차지했다. 그 다음으로는 남성의 경우 ‘궁상맞아 보인다’(19.7%)와 ‘제약이 없어 좋겠다’(15.9%), ‘성문제를 어떻게 해결할까’(11.7%)의 순서로 답했다. 여성은 ‘뭔가 모를 문제가 있나’(28.0%), ‘걱정거리가 별로 없겠다’(15.9%), 그리고 ‘궁상맞아 보인다’(12.1%)의 순으로 답했다. 비에나래의 손동규 명품커플위원장은 “남성은 여성에 비해 일반적으로 결혼 의사가 높은데 별다른 이유 없이 늦게까지 결혼을 하지 않을 경우 주변에서는 그 이유를 궁금하게 생각한다”라며 “한편 결혼을 통해 신체적, 경제적, 그리고 정서적 안정을 꾀하려는 욕구가 강한 여성이 독신 상태로 나이가 들면 뭔가 결여된 듯한 느낌을 받는다”라고 설명했다. 이외에도‘늦게까지 결혼을 하지 않은 이성이 결혼상대로 탐탁지 않게 느껴지는 이유’를 묻는 설문에 대해서는 남성과 여성의 의견이 달랐다. 남성은 ‘(배우자 조건 등이) 까다로울 것 같아서’(46.2%)를, 여성은 ‘원만하지 못한 인간관계일 것 같아서’(33.3%)를 각각 1위로 꼽았다. 그 외 남성은 ‘비정상적인 성격일 것 같아서’(16.7%), ‘(혼자 사는데 익숙하여) 결혼생활에 부적합할 것 같아서’(14.4%), ‘원만하지 못한 인간관계일 것 같아서’(12.5%) 등의 순으로 답했다. 반면 여성은 ‘조건이 까다로울 것 같아서’(25.8%), ‘비정상적인 성격일 것 같아서’(18.6%), ‘부부관계 상 문제가 있을 것 같아서’(11.0%) 등의 순을 보였다. 커플예감 필링유의 조은영 매칭팀장은 “남성, 여성 모두 결혼이 늦는 데는 각 개인별로 다양한 이유가 있을 수 있다”라며 “그러나 나이 든 이성을 소개받는 입장에서는 상대에게 성격이나 배우자 조건 상 문제가 있지 않나 의심하는 사례가 많다”라고 설문결과를 풀이했다.
 
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