By Jane Han
For the past two days, I so deeply and desperately wished I could just call in sick to motherhood, crawl into bed and shut the world out.
There is one universal truth of parenting ― moms can't get sick. And I've sadly gone against it.
Somewhere between hauling my three kids back and forth from school and play dates to keeping this busy house under control, I caught a nasty hell-cold and sinus infection.
It's been roughly two years since I got any kind of a cold. Two years.
I guess my body fought pretty hard and well over the past 730 days.
I don't know how many times my children had the stomach flu, cold, hand-foot-and-mouth disease and all kinds of other funky viruses over the same period. Not once did I come down with anything they had.
At one point, I thought my body was some kind of ironclad or something. I guess it was just my mommy power.
But this time, I have been totally knocked down.
Just like how symptoms get worse for kids overnight, same goes for adults. My nose would get stuffier and my headache would start up every time the sun goes down. And a combination of all these awful symptoms would keep me up literally all night.
When you're childless, sick days like these may not be that huge of a deal. Worse comes to worst, you could just call in sick and stay home from work, stay in bed, eat soup, nap, watch TV and repeat all day.
But when you have kids and you're a stay-at-home mom, there is no place to call in. No matter how sick mom is, business must go as usual.
Kids need to be fed breakfast, dressed, taken to school, brought back and washed; house needs to be cleaned somewhat; and dinner has to be made, only to name some of the major stuff.
When there's a to-do list this long and you have a raging temperature and a nose so stuffed you can barely breathe, the only thing to rely on is cold medicine ― a lot of it.
In a perfect world, I would turn to the husband, but very unfortunately, this week is a crucial workweek for him so I couldn't count on him to fill in for me.
So what do I do? What could help any mom who's down and sick?
For starters, learn to just let go.
Let the house get messy, let the kids snack on chips, let them watch cartoons on repeat and let yourself or your partner pick up take-out food if not delivery. Just let go for a while. It's just a few days, a week at max.
I'm not saying this is easy.
Trust me, walking straight past a pile of clutter and giving in to Ellen and Ann's request for yet another snack was hard at first, but it did get easier every time.
In fact, by the second day, I learned to make it easier for the kids to simply help themselves ― so I wouldn't have to get up.
I would leave their water cups all filled and ready to go on the edge of the countertop so that they wouldn't come to me every time they needed to dispense water from the purifier.
I left healthy snacks like peeled tangerine and dried sweet potato in various easy-to-reach places so that the girls could snack on them instead of coming to me.
And when I am up out of my bed, I make sure that I am as efficient as I can possibly be.
I ask the girls if they need anything, leave out more food, and change Lauren's diaper even if it may not be sagging wet. This way, I don't have to get up again at least for another 30 minutes.
This next one I didn't exercise myself, but I should've.
Accept help.
I've had a number of generous friends who offered to take my girls for a few hours and babysit so that I could rest in peace and quiet. I turned them down because I felt bad.
But come to think of it, it would've been wiser for me to take up the offer, rest and recover faster, instead of dragging things along in a chaotic house. And I could've easily returned the favor by doing the same for my other mom friends if, God forbid, they get sick and need help.
I guess even getting sick gets better with experience.
I hate being sick, but after two years of going strong, I think my body deserves a little down time.
Now the biggest fear for me is passing this on to my kids.
Oh God, no.
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There is one universal truth of parenting ― moms can't get sick. And I've sadly gone against it.
Somewhere between hauling my three kids back and forth from school and play dates to keeping this busy house under control, I caught a nasty hell-cold and sinus infection.
It's been roughly two years since I got any kind of a cold. Two years.
I guess my body fought pretty hard and well over the past 730 days.
I don't know how many times my children had the stomach flu, cold, hand-foot-and-mouth disease and all kinds of other funky viruses over the same period. Not once did I come down with anything they had.
At one point, I thought my body was some kind of ironclad or something. I guess it was just my mommy power.
But this time, I have been totally knocked down.
Just like how symptoms get worse for kids overnight, same goes for adults. My nose would get stuffier and my headache would start up every time the sun goes down. And a combination of all these awful symptoms would keep me up literally all night.
When you're childless, sick days like these may not be that huge of a deal. Worse comes to worst, you could just call in sick and stay home from work, stay in bed, eat soup, nap, watch TV and repeat all day.
But when you have kids and you're a stay-at-home mom, there is no place to call in. No matter how sick mom is, business must go as usual.
Kids need to be fed breakfast, dressed, taken to school, brought back and washed; house needs to be cleaned somewhat; and dinner has to be made, only to name some of the major stuff.
When there's a to-do list this long and you have a raging temperature and a nose so stuffed you can barely breathe, the only thing to rely on is cold medicine ― a lot of it.
In a perfect world, I would turn to the husband, but very unfortunately, this week is a crucial workweek for him so I couldn't count on him to fill in for me.
So what do I do? What could help any mom who's down and sick?
For starters, learn to just let go.
Let the house get messy, let the kids snack on chips, let them watch cartoons on repeat and let yourself or your partner pick up take-out food if not delivery. Just let go for a while. It's just a few days, a week at max.
I'm not saying this is easy.
Trust me, walking straight past a pile of clutter and giving in to Ellen and Ann's request for yet another snack was hard at first, but it did get easier every time.
In fact, by the second day, I learned to make it easier for the kids to simply help themselves ― so I wouldn't have to get up.
I would leave their water cups all filled and ready to go on the edge of the countertop so that they wouldn't come to me every time they needed to dispense water from the purifier.
I left healthy snacks like peeled tangerine and dried sweet potato in various easy-to-reach places so that the girls could snack on them instead of coming to me.
And when I am up out of my bed, I make sure that I am as efficient as I can possibly be.
I ask the girls if they need anything, leave out more food, and change Lauren's diaper even if it may not be sagging wet. This way, I don't have to get up again at least for another 30 minutes.
This next one I didn't exercise myself, but I should've.
Accept help.
I've had a number of generous friends who offered to take my girls for a few hours and babysit so that I could rest in peace and quiet. I turned them down because I felt bad.
But come to think of it, it would've been wiser for me to take up the offer, rest and recover faster, instead of dragging things along in a chaotic house. And I could've easily returned the favor by doing the same for my other mom friends if, God forbid, they get sick and need help.
I guess even getting sick gets better with experience.
I hate being sick, but after two years of going strong, I think my body deserves a little down time.
Now the biggest fear for me is passing this on to my kids.
Oh God, no.
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